FARSCAPE

"LOOK AT THE PRINCESS, PART 3: The Maltese Crichton"

Written by,
David Kemper



Transcript provided by: Farscape Ally!, with able assistance from 30d954A. Thanks 3030!

Additional editing provided by $al-Man.


Starring:
Ben Browder
Claudia Black
Virginia Hey
Anthony Simcoe
Gigi Edgley
Commander John Crichton
Officer Aeryn Sun
Pa'u Zotoh Zhaan
Ka D'Argo
Chiana
Guest Starring:
Matt Day
Wayne Pygram
Jonathan Hardy
Tina Bursill
Bianca Chiminello
Felix Williamson
Aaron Cash
Thomas Holesgrove
Nicholas McKay
Rose Kemp
Felicity Price
Thomas Holesgrove (?)
Counselor Tyno
Scorpius
Kahaynu
Empress Novia
Jenavian Chatto
Prince Clavor
Dregon Cazanova
Cargn
Voice of Cargn
Voice of Moya
Voice of Princess Katralla
Man (Uncredited)
Note from Transcriber: It remains a mystery who played the 'Luke Skywalker' personage in white who 'rescues' Aeryn and Dregon. Mythos has it, that this is Thomas Holesgrove in a rare 'out of costume' outing. Anyone who can substantiate or burst this mythos with hard evidence... please, please... email me!





Writer: David Kemper

Who also wrote:
(1:12*) "Rhapsody In Blue", (1:17) "Through The Looking Glass", (1:21*) "Bone To Be Wild", (1:22*) "Family Ties", (2:10) "Look At The Princess, Part 1: A Kiss Is But A Kiss", (2:11) "Look At The Princess, Part 2: I Do, I Think", (2:21) "Look At The Princess, Part 3: The Maltese Crichton", (2:22) "Die Me Dichotomy", (3:03) "Self-Inflicted Wounds, Part 1: Could'a, Would'a, Should'a".






Director: Andrew Prowse & Tony Tilse

Andrew Prowse also directed:
(1:01) "Premiere", (1:09) "DNA Mad Scientist", (1:12) "Rhapsody In Blue", (1:21) "Bone To Be Wild", (2:02) "Mind The Baby", (2:06) "Picture If You Will", (2:10*) "Look At The Princess, Part 1: A Kiss Is But A Kiss", (2:21*) "Look At The Princess, Part 2: I Do, I Think", (2:11*) "Look At The Princess, Part 3: The Maltese Crichton", (2:18) "Liars, Guns & Money, Part I: A Not So Simple Plan", (3:02) "Suns & Lovers".

Tony Tilse Also Directed:
(1:07) "PK Tech Girl", (1:11) "Till The Blood Runs Clear", (1:15) "Durka Returns", (1:18) "A Bugs Life", (1:22) "Family Ties", (2:03) "Vitas Mortis", (2:07) "The Way We Weren't", (2:10*) "Look At The Princess, Part 1: A Kiss Is But A Kiss", (2:21*) "Look At The Princess, Part 2: I Do, I Think", (2:11*) "Look At The Princess, Part 3: The Maltese Crichton", (2:13) "Beware Of Dog", (2:16) "The Ugly Truth", (2:20) "Liars, Guns & Money, Part 3: Plan B", (3:03) "Self-Inflicted Wounds, Part 1: Could'a, Would'a, Should'a".




Co-Executive Producers Richard Manning
Naren Shankar
Produced by: Sue Milliken
Written by: David Kemper
Directed by: Andrew Prowse & Tony Tilse
Executive Producers: David Kemper
Brian Henson
Rod Perth
Robert Halmi, Jr.
Executive Consultant: Rockne S. O'Bannon
Creative Consultant: Justin Monjo
Executive Story Editors: Gabrielle Stanton & Harry Werksman, Jr.
Director of Photography: Russell Bacon
Production Designer: Tim Ferrier
Associate Producer: Andrew Prowse
Music by: Guy Gross
Costume Designer: Terry Ryan
Editor: Wayne Le Clees (? -- frelling 1/3 screen credits!)
Second Unit DOP: Danny Batterham
Story Editor: Lily Taylor
Script Editor: Grant McAloon
Production Executive: Robert Woznian
Creature Shop Creative Supervisor: Dave Elsey
Visual Effects by: Animal Logic












COLD OPEN





INT. PALACE -- Audience Chamber

Tyno, D'Argo and Chiana enter the audience chamber, still in wedding garb. The Statues of John and Katralla 'stand' on a raised dais at the back of the chamber. The statues are flanked by a couple of palace guards. Rygel stands on the platform watching a tech take readings.
D'ARGO: They look so...

CHIANA: ...stiff.

RYGEL: I think he should have taken his pose more seriously.

TYNO: I believe he did the best he could.

D'ARGO: So, what happens now?

TYNO: For them, 80 cycles of government. Boring, but ultimately advantageous.

CHIANA: And what do we do?

TYNO: Scorpius has been asked to leave our system within the solar day. Once his command carrier vacates...

D'ARGO: ...we hope that Moya returns and picks us up.

CHIANA: You really going to stay, Ryge?

RYGEL: Why not? Crichton will need advising... and ( chuckles ) the food's good.

D'ARGO: So, he can hear us?

TYNO: Every word. The acoustics of this chamber funnel all sounds to them.

D'ARGO: May we say goodbye.

TYNO: I'll wait outside.

Tyno and the guard exit.

D'ARGO: John...

Crichton's response is immediate if tinney, transmitted through the receiver pressed to D'Argo's... ear.

CRICHTON: Hey, D'Argo.

D'ARGO: ( smiling ) He can hear us. ... Do you feel any pain?

CRICHTON: No, but I'd really love to pick my nose.

D'ARGO: He remains 'without' a sense of humor.

D'Argo and Chiana chuckle weakly.

D'ARGO: It's good to hear your voice, John.

CRICHTON: Yours too. ... Hey, can I say hi to Chiana?

D'ARGO: Chiana...

D'Argo hands the small receiver to Chiana. She immediately presses the device to her ear, leaning close to Crichton.

CHIANA: You look great in bronze.

CRICHTON: You look great in pink. ... Brings out your eyes.

Chiana laughs lightly.



INTERCUT

INT. PALACE -- Audience Chamber

The now deserted Audience Chamber, only the statues of Katralla and Crichton remain in the room which is now cloaked in muted light. Cargn follows Clavor into the chamber. The latter rants against his disposition.

CLAVOR: Frell! Frell! Frell! -- I'm going to topple his statue! I should be Regent!

Clavor throws a punch against Crichton's metallized cheek. The action is accompanied by a loud clank and Clavor's gasp of pain. The dimwit Prince sits at the foot of Crichton's statue, cradling his mangled hand, whimpering in pain.

CARGN: While enormously symbolic, Your Highness, may I propose a more permanent tactic?

CLAVOR: What?!

The Scarran, standing behind Crichton's statue, lifts one arm, a laser sword erupts from his wrist. With a single swift downstroke, the blade slices through Crichton's neck. The head of the statue hops off it's shoulders and drops into the lap of a stunned but pleased Clavor.



INTERCUT

INT. FOUNDRY

Cargn and Clavor enter the darkened and abandoned environs of what looks to be a foundry of some kind. A large cistern of bubbling green liquid dominates the room.
CARGN: Are you sure he's still alive?

CLAVOR: Of course. Each cell is self-encapsulated. As long as the parts stay in their metallized state, he can be reconstituted.

CARGN: Very impressive.

CLAVOR: My ah, Great-Grandfather was broken in half when the senate collapsed after a groundshaker. All he suffered was a severe limp! ( laughs )

CARGN: Foundry acid should ensure this ruler fares worse.

Cargn moves to toss Crichton's head into the pool of acid, but Clavor intercepts him.

CLAVOR: No, no, no, no! Give it to me- give it to me.

Taking he head, Clavor rests it heavily on the stone edge of the cistern, he gloats in his victory, taunting Crichton.

CLAVOR: I know you can hear me, Crichton, and I know you're scared... Our laws state that a couple must rule together. Hm? That's why the crown must soon pass to me... because you can't rule with one little head!

With that, Clavor shoves Crichton's head into the pool of acid, where it bobs about like a cork.



END COLD OPEN










ROLL OPENING CREDITS



My name is John Crichton, an astronaut... ...a radiation wave, and I got shot through a wormhole... now I'm lost in some distant part of the universe, on a ship-- a living ship, full of strange alien life-forms.... Help me. Listen please... is there anybody out there who can hear me? ....I'm being hunted by an insane military commander... doing everything I can... I'm just looking for a way home.






ACT I



EXT. ROYAL PLANET, Scenic Vista

Aeryn and Dregon in climbing gear drag, stand between a pair of towers, an ocean in the background. A gorgeous sight. An impressive climb ahead.

AERYN: I propose that we start here and traverse around.

DREGON: Excellent.

AERYN: You always this agreeable?

DREGON: ( chuckles ) Am I being agreeable?

AERYN: Well... everything I've suggested... since the moment we met... you've consented to.

DREGON: They've all been good ideas.

AERYN: And your proficiency at this is?

DREGON: I've been rated expert.

AERYN: Really.

Dregon embraces Aeryn quickly, bending her back for a passionate kiss. She lets him.

AERYN: Mm. That's clearly a local custom. What's this one called? "Kiss your climbing partner"?

DREGON: A different local custom. "Kiss woman you're attracted to."

AERYN: Right. You ready?

They prepare to begin the ascent.



INTERCUT

INT. PALACE -- The Audience Chamber

Novia stalks about the chamber, enraged. Her ladies in waiting trail her like ducklings as she circles the dais where the statues of her daughter and headless son-in-law stand.

NOVIA: Whoever perpetrated this atrocity shall pay in kind! Beheaded!

D'ARGO: Surely you don't think--

NOVIA: Silence! This planet is under stringent law until my daughter's husband is made whole! No one is to leave... or even contact their vessels... whether they purport to be a friend of the crown or not!

The Empress and her 'ducklings' depart in a snit.

TYNO: Where is the one called Aeryn Sun? The former Peacekeeper?

RYGEL: We don't know.

TYNO: She was upset that Crichton was to marry the Princess. I saw it with my own eyes.

D'ARGO: You cannot possibly think that--

TYNO: I can't possibly not! Find her. Bring her to us for questioning.

RYGEL: If you want someone with a motive for stealing Crichton's head, try that digivah, Scorpius!

TYNO: Everyone is suspect, especially off-worlders. If Prince Clavor assumes the throne, I cannot guarantee your safety. ... Find your friends head!



INTERCUT

INT. FOUNDRY

Scorpius fishes Crichton's head out of the pool of acid with a large sieve. Lifting the bobbing head out of the acid, Scorpius tosses it on the floor. The sieve is also discarded, and lands on the floor, the metal strands melting almost immediately.

Scorpius retrieves Crichton's head from the floor.


SCORPIUS: Very fortunate I sampled your DNA when you were in the Aurora Chair.... There would have been no other way to track you, Crichton.

Scorpius lifts the head, examining it closely for damage, blotting the remaining acid from the features of the metallized head

SCORPIUS: Although the crystallization of your cells was designed to withstand 80 cycles of airborne corrosives.... It seems, three arns ... well, a full on acid attack is all it takes... you're beginning to pit! And while I won't be able to retrieve your body... the wormhole calculations you have in your mind--

Scorpius' one sided conversation is interrupted when he overhears a noise. He quickly bags Crichton's head.

SCORPIUS: Who's there? ( growling ) Who's there!

Scorpius is hurled back against the wall by an energy blast. He staggers, but does not go down. A second blast full in the chest sends him to the ground.



INTERCUT

INT. MOYA

Zhaan works on Crichton's module with the assistance of a single DRD. She is most definitely not happy. Even less so when Kahaynu makes an appearance.

KAHAYNU: You should use one of Moya's Transport Pods instead of that little one.

ZHAAN: What do you care what I do?

KAHAYNU: All life is precious. Yours should continue.

ZHAAN: And Moya's shouldn't?!

KAHAYNU: We have been through this.... Moya can produce gunship offspring. We did not intend the universe to be subjected to such an affliction. I'm sorry. I must leave now.

ZHAAN: No. Kahaynu! If Moya's life is to end capriciously, and Pilot's also... you and I are going to remain with them!

KAHAYNU: Doubtful.

Kahaynu continues drifting away

ZHAAN: DRD! Now! In reverse!

The Farscape's engines ignite, the smokey tendrils of Kahaynu are slowly drawn into the engine.

KAHAYNU: What? Stop this!

ZHAAN: Recommission Moya!

KAHAYNU: I cannot... I will not. Turn the engine off!

ZHAAN: I will spare you, if you spare Moya.

KAHAYNU: Stop! I beg you!

ZHAAN: How does it feel for your prayers to go unanswered, Kahaynu?

The last of Kahaynu is sucked into the Farscape's engines. Zhaan gasps in disbelief of her actions.

ZHAAN: Dear Goddess... in my rage... what have I done?



INTERCUT

INT. PALACE -- Private Rooms

Chiana lounges back on a bed, lovely white robe draping her... D'Argo enters, much dejected, and collapses on the bed. Chiana gathers him in her arms.

D'ARGO: I cannot find Crichton's head anywhere.... I feel miserable.

CHIANA: Hey... aren't you tired?

D'ARGO: Just responsible. I'm the one that talked him into it.

CHIANA: We had no other options-- you said that yourself.... We take what we get.



INTERCUT

INT. PALACE

Jena uncovers Crichton's head. Behind Jena and Crichton, his 'headless' statue has been returned to stand inside the 'gizmo' that turned him into a statue. Jena dons the receiver, which will allow her to communicate with Crichton in his present state. Before she can get the headset on her ear, she pulls it away quickly, as his tinney shrieks pierce her ear.

CRICHTON: ( shrieking ) My body! My body!

JENA: I'm working on it.

CRICHTON: Working on it! It's impossible.

JENA: Strangely not-- if I do this right... your current state is not terminal.

CRICHTON: And if not done right?

JENA: Terminal.

CRICHTON: Get experts.

JENA: We're beyond that... don't you think? You're way too vulnerable in this state-- see exhibits "A" and "B".

Jena gestures to Crichton's body, in the freezer, and his head... on a table across the room.

CRICHTON: Have you got a plan?

Jena fiddles with the controls of the 'freezing chamber'.

JENA: Revitalize you. Your speech abilities are so limited right now, you couldn't convince the Empress you're a headless statue.

Jena strides to the table and picks up Crichton's head.

CRICHTON: Whoa. Nice dress.

JENA: Save it.

She carries his head over to his body, stepping up inside the 'freezing chamber'.

JENA: When the Empress sees you, my true fiance and his Scarran will be in deep dren. Then you can be remade in to a statue.

CRICHTON: That's not much of a plan.

JENA: As long as the parts are aligned right... the machine should do the rest.

Jena 'arranges' Crichton's head on his shoulders, grinding metal on metal as she seeks an acceptable position.

CRICHTON: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, hey, hey, hey, wait, wait, wait! Just a second! Hey, come back!

Jena pulls the transmitter off her head, effectively silencing Crichton. She fiddles with the controls, and the machine whirs to life. Cold fire races though Crichton's metallized body, slowly transmuting him to flesh and blood form.

For a long moment, Crichton remains frozen in the same position, arm upraised, face contorted in pain. Slowly he lowers his arm, groaning in pain. Jena walks toward him, watching curiously.


CRICHTON: ( groaning )

JENA: Can you turn your neck?

Crichton turns his head tenatively, you can 'hear' his muscles grinding.

CRICHTON: ( groans )

JENA: Can you speak?

Crichton groans a bit more, then manages a weak and rasping answer.

CRICHTON: Thank you.

JENA: Can you walk?

CRICHTON: ... uh... uh...

Crichton attempts to stand, managing to put one foot out before collapsing to the floor. He's out of sight, groaning on the floor. Jena rolls unsympathetic eyes and lets out a sigh of frustration.



INTERCUT

Cargn and Clavor are outside the palace, in the 'garden', plotting.

CARGN: I told you... it's best we're not seen together until you assume the line of succession!

CLAVOR: You mean, if I do! Crichton's body is gone... someone used the processor to revitalize him!

CARGN: Without his head.... is that really a concern?

CLAVOR: They're still reconstructing the data, but it seems... 'o great frell-up'! ... that his head was attached at the time!

CARGN: Someone retrieved his head?

CLAVOR: Do something, 'o magnificent representative of a supposedly master race'! ... or you will surely die at my mother's hand... and I? I will cheer her on!



INTERCUT

Aeryn and Dregon dangle precariously from the side of a sheer cliff. Aeryn, quite confident, and in her element it seems, has taken the lead in the climb. Her partner, Dregon, hangs back, sweating bullets.

AERYN: Dregon... what's wrong?

DREGON: Nothing.

AERYN: I've secured it... you can come up now. Are your lines stuck? ( long pause ) I'm coming down!

DREGON: It's okay.

AERYN: Dregon?

DREGON: I'm... just...

AERYN: Are you injured?

DREGON: We're too high...

AERYN: What?

Aeryn decends to just above Dregon's head. He hasn't changed his position, although he keeps reaching about, searching for purchase. Whether his intent is to climb up, or down, isn't clear.
AERYN: You've done this before haven't you? Isn't that right? ... You were rated 'expert'... correct?

DREGON: ( sighing ) At the training facility.

AERYN: This is your first wall?

DREGON: Yeah... outside...

AERYN: For the love of Chilnack. All right... hang on.

Aeryn decends a bit further, standing on a small outcropping just above Dregon's hand. She reaches down trying to assist him.

AERYN: All right... grab my hand. ( long pause ) Dregon, just grab my hand.

Dregon finally takes her offered hand.

AERYN: Good. Good, all right.... no...

DREGON: Help me... please... don't let me fall...

AERYN: I won't, it's fine. All you have to do is hold on with that hand there-- that left hand. Can you do that?

Dregon takes a grip on the wall with his left hand.

AERYN: You got it? ... Take a deep ...

Dregon's foot slips from his purchase and he slides backward slightly, yelping in panic, his weight pulling against Aeryn's grip.

AERYN: Take a deep breath! ( pause ) Take a deep breath... that's it. All right now, hold on, I've got you.

Dregon's foot slips again, in panic he releases Aeryn's hand, first trying to grip the wall, and then grabbing her leg.

AERYN: No, no, no, no, no! Not my leg-- the wall! Hold onto the wall!

But no time remains for cautionary climbing lessons, as Dregon's weight, flung entirely on Aeryn's hold, pulls them both off the wall and they fall.



INTERCUT

EXT. Royal Planet

Jena and Crichton stagger toward a small shelter erected at the edge of a body of water. It's an idyllic scene, except that Crichton can't quite master the act of walking, and his weight leans heavily against Jena.

CRICHTON: Where the hell are we?

JENA: Don't worry about it... somewhere no one will find you.

CRICHTON: That was not my question.

Jena hurls Crichton face down on a pile of blankets inside the shelter, kicking him in the ribs for good meaure.

CRICHTON: ( grunts ) Ouch.

JENA: Is that your real name? 'John Crichton'?

CRICHTON: Yeah.

Jena grabs him by one leg and flops him over onto his back.

JENA: And which Sebacean house is that from?

CRICHTON: You know... if I tell you... I'll have to kill you.

She takes one of his lax arms and pulls him roughly into a seated position.

JENA: Why is Scorpius here?

CRICHTON: You don't know?

She crouches down beside him.

JENA: He's not part of my brief. However, he seems to be part of yours.

CRICHTON: Look, I appreciate that you have questions... I'm sure you'll appreciate that I'm not gonna answer them.

Crichton attempts to lie back down, but Jena grabs him roughly by the arm and pulls him upright.

CRICHTON: ( grunts )

Jena drapes one arm across his shoulders, whispering almost conspiratorially.

JENA: I heard some of what Scorpius said. He wasn't protecting you as an ally... he was capturing you as prey.

Crichton looks into her eyes silently, his gaze slides downward, pausing briefly, then slides back to her eyes.

CRICHTON: You wouldn't like the truth.

She flings him back to the floor of the tent, his face half buried in the piled blankets. She stands and prowls the tent, arms crossed.

JENA: The data scan of 'Mr. John Crichton', list him as a non-Sebacean...

Crichton lifts his head, looking at her from the corner of his eye.

JENA: ... so... if you're not Sebacean you're not a Peacekeeper... and if you're not a Peacekeeper, you're not Special Directorate... and if you're not Special Directorate, you can't be a Disruptor...
Crichton pushes himself back to a seated position, weight braced on one arm, rubbing his eyes with the other.

JENA: ... and if you're not a Disruptor...

With frightening speed, Jena crouches behind Crichton, violently pulling his head up and back, holding it in a viselike grip, the point of the stilletto ejected from her right wrist, held gleaming at his bare throat.

CRICHTON: ( grunts )

JENA: ...then you know too much about me.



END ACT I










ACT II



Inside the tent, Jena holds the stilletto poised over Crichton's neck, his head held tightly against her shoulder.

CRICHTON: Well, there's more but... that pretty much sums it up, yeah.

JENA: That's either the most pathetic fabrication I've ever heard, or the most pathetic life I could ever imagine. Either way...

CRICHTON: Oh, like their aren't some whacked-out antecedents to a chick with a stilletto in her wrist.

The stilletto slides back into it's place of concealment, and she releases him slowly.

CRICHTON: Better.

Crichton moves swiftly and fluidly, rotating his body on one foot to face Jena. Her eyebrow arches in appreciation.

CRICHTON: So, did you kill Scorpy?

JENA: Leave bodies lying around? They'd look for a killer. It's not like he's going to report the assault.

CRICHTON: Then why choose me over him?

JENA: Because I couldn't give a crag's ass about anything but my job... prevent the Scarrans from getting a claw on this empire. ... You're my best chance of making that happen.

CRICHTON: Assuming I'm willing to play garden gnome for the next 80 cycles.

Jena slowly moves closer to him, entreating him gently.

JENA: John... if I fail... so many innocent lives will be lost. ... Help me do my job... and I'll help you get what you want... whatever it is.

Crichton eyes her speculatively.

CRICHTON: You know... things never work out like you plan.

JENA: ( smiling ) That's what makes it fun.





INTERCUT

Aeryn limps past Dregon, lying battered and bloodied on the ground. She seats herself gently. Her right leg splinted and sporting her own fair share of bloody scrapes and cuts. They have, amazingly, survived a brutal fall.

DREGON: Isn't there... any other way to contact help?

AERYN: Not unless a ship passes... and sees us...

DREGON: I told you before; these are the Devastator Reefs, boats never come here.

AERYN: Well then... inland is our only hope. Unless of course, you want to stay.

DREGON: Please... don't leave me.

AERYN: Don't tempt me!



INTERCUT

INT. MOYA, PILOT'S DEN

Zhaan is performing the Delvian Last-Rites over the stricken Leviathan's Pilot.
ZHAAN: May the goddess recognize the gentleness of your spirit, and guide you to your ancestors.

KAHAYNU: Pa'u Zotoh Zhaan...

ZHAAN: ( angrily ) You live.

KAHAYNU: As does Moya.

The silence is broken by Moya's systems coming to life, a deep whirring thoughout the ship and the engines operate. The lights in the Den return to normal levels, and Pilot stirs behind his console... his eyes opening slowly.

ZHAAN: What kind of repellant game is this?

KAHAYNU: Upon my first exploration of Moya... I knew the circumstances that produced her gunship offspring, and I knew she was a worthy soul.

ZHAAN: Then, why did you put her through this?

KAHAYNU: To see if you were worthy. ... These are gentle beasts, who will ultimately follow the directions of those in control. ... Should you desire it, Priestess... you could produce an army of killing machines.

PILOT: But... Zhaan would... never...

KAHAYNU: Of course she wouldn't. ... We know that now. We are confident that you will protect Moya vigorously against those who seek to exploit her. ... You are worthy of that responsibility.

ZHAAN: If that is so, then I demand you leave this ship immediately.

KAHAYNU: As you wish... but first... Moya wishes to speak with you.

MOYA: Zhaan... ... one request ...

ZHAAN: Anything, Moya.

MOYA: ... sing ...



INTERCUT

INT. ROYAL PLANET, The Bar

Scorpius stands at the bar, D'Argo approaches him, glowering with anger.
SCORPIUS: It's good that you came.

D'ARGO: Do you know where Crichton is?

SCORPIUS: Honestly? ... No. But I'm as anxious to find him as you are.

D'ARGO: For his wormhole knowledge.

SCORPIUS: Hm. That's secondary at this point. I'm without accompaniment, totally unarmed. Should the Empress... wish to execute us... I have no doubt she would succeed.

D'ARGO: So now we are allies.

SCORPIUS: Hm. Effectively... yes. I assume you know Sastaretski Cargn, the Scarran emissary?

D'ARGO: ... and his alliance with Prince Clavor.

SCORPIUS: Who's next in line for the throne, so... they are our natural suspects.

D'ARGO: What do you want, Scorpius?

SCORPIUS: I will help you get Crichton off this planet alive... collect the information I need from his mind... and release him to you... unharmed.

D'ARGO: You're half Scarran... aren't you?

SCORPIUS: By which measure I should not be judged!

CARGN: Because it would find him lacking.

D'Argo turns to leave, having his fill of this type of company.

CARGN: Ka D'Argo, is it? Luxan. A great race of warriors. I am honored...

D'Argo sighs and turns back.

CARGN: ... and to you, biological mistake, I commend your plan. Having an agent marry the Princess... how did you defeat my DNA alterations of her?

D'ARGO: Scorpius is not in league with Crichton. We despise him.

CARGN: Truly? Have I misjudged the situation that badly?

SCORPIUS: Even if you establish diplomatic ties with this dynasty... that would mean that we... Peacekeepers... would have to respond, preventing it... and that would mean a total conflagration!

CARGN: But who would be seen as aggressor? All but sealing their access to the Uncharted Territories.

Cargn growls and turning on D'Argo, aim's his 'mind-melting beam' at him. D'Argo falls against the bar under the force of it.

D'ARGO: Aah!

CARGN: Luxan brute! Where is Crichton!

D'ARGO: ( gasping ) I don't know.

CARGN: Has he been reconstituted into flesh and blood form?

D'ARGO: I don't know!

CARGN: Is there anyone who does?

D'ARGO: Chiana... think she does.

The Scarran speaks a few growled syllables that seem to be in his own language, and terminates the beam. D'Argo grunts and slumps to the floor.

SCORPIUS: I will offer you a deal.

CARGN: I would rather race you to the Nebari girl, Chiana.

SCORPIUS: The means to our different goals... may be the same, Emissary.

CARGN: What about the coming conflagration between our species?

SCORPIUS: If you wish to provoke Peacekeeper might... well, we shall oblige... by defeating you.

CARGN: I would still rather race you to the girl.



INTERCUT

EXT. PLANET

Aeryn drags Dregon across a desolate and rocky wasteland on a makeshift travois. Her every step is accompanied by a grunt of pain as she uses a length of wood as a crutch to brace her broken leg.

DREGON: ( groaning ) Please!

AERYN: "Please..." stop dragging you?

DREGON: No... but it...

AERYN: I know... it hurts...

DREGON: ( whimpering ) Yes.

AERYN: You want it to not hurt?

DREGON: Aah.

AERYN: Well, next time... hold onto the frelling wall!



INTERCUT

INT. ROYAL PALACE, The Bar

Rygel sits disconsolately at the bar, D'Argo barges in on his reverie.

D'ARGO: Rygel! Have you seen Chiana?

RYGEL: No. Have you tried... ( hiccups )... looking under your sheets?

D'ARGO: I think Scorpius and the Scarran may have her. They think she knows where John and Aeryn are.

RYGEL: We were looking together when she... ( hiccups ) ...split off.

D'ARGO: Yeah?

RYGEL: I'm so nervous, I had to stop for a bite... ( hiccups )... which I'm too nervous to eat.

D'ARGO: All right... what's the matter?

RYGEL: I asked around. The last time the Empress threatened to execute off-worlders... ( hiccups )... she did!

D'ARGO: Rygel... I need your help. They're going to torture her, and she doesn't know anything!

RYGEL: I'll float above the streets for a better view!

D'ARGO: Yes!

RYGEL: We'll find her!



INTERCUT

EXT. PALACE, The Garden

Cargn enters the small outdoor pavilion he and Clavor favor for their conspiracy sessions, an unconcious Chiana is draped across his shoulders.

CLAVOR: What the frell is that?

CARGN: She does not know Crichton's whereabouts... as suspected.

CLAVOR: So... get rid of her.

CARGN: I believe she may have some other use.

CLAVOR: I don't even want to know. Cargn, we're through. Everything you said would come to pass has not.

Cargn shrugs, dumping Chiana to the ground.

CARGN: I'm simply trying to ensure your ascension. If Crichton is not found by tomorrow, you'll be crowned.

CLAVOR: Through no efforts of yours, sadly. Which means I no longer need your allegiance.

CARGN: The dissolution of our relationship is not yours to effect.

CLAVOR: Look, my mother knows about us. I can't be married until I renounce you.

CARGN: I will not allow it.

CLAVOR: I'm doing you a favor. Mm-hm. She's going to start the ceremony by executing off-worlders. Hm. Get out of here, hide... run.

CARGN: There is no way for me to escape and you know it.

CLAVOR: And I thought you were good.

CARGN: I am... I have one final question for you duplicitous Prince Clavor...

CLAVOR: Wha...

Cargn turns his 'mind-melting beam' on the Prince who is instantly enveloped by the waves of heat.

CARGN: Do you know that as promised... I am about to kill you?

CLAVOR: N... n...

Clavor's skin begins to blister and melt, and he gurgles, screams and dies.

CARGN: Yes...



END ACT II










ACT III





EXT. PLANET, The Lake

Crichton approaches the tent, stripped to black tanktop, he flexes his fingers gently as he approaches Jena, waiting for him inside the tent.

CRICHTON: Just a little tingling in the hands and feet... I'm good to go.

JENA: Too late. Local animals are carniverous after dark.

CRICHTON: Animals... okay, fine, first light-- I have people to protect.

JENA: As I must mine. ... Can I trust you?

CRICHTON: Oh, yeah. I'm a regular 'Boy Scout'. ... I do what I have to do.

JENA: And I assume you do it well.

Crichton ducks below the netting surrounding the tent and enters, sliding past Jena.



INTERCUT

INT. PALACE, Private Rooms

D'Argo sits alone on the edge of his bed, abjectly unsatisfied. He comes alert just slightly, inhaling sharply, then growls. Casting a look over one shoulder he watches as Scorpius approaches.

SCORPIUS: I, uh... I have found Cargn. It will take both of us to kill him. Scarrans have... exceptional strength.

D'ARGO: And why do you think I'll help you?

SCORPIUS: He has Chiana... and you want her.

D'ARGO: And you don't?

SCORPIUS: I want John Crichton.

D'ARGO: You'll never get Crichton... he'll die first.

SCORPIUS: You... underestimate the strength of our relationship. Even your friend does not yet understand.



INTERCUT

EXT. PLANET, The Lake

Darkness has decended. A campfire flickers beneath a tripod holding a pot suspended above it. In the lake, Crichton holds Jena in his arms, their naked shoulders shine in the starlight. Their voices are muted, and they laughing softly, John kisses her throughly. Locked in a mutual embrace, they continue kissing as they drift aimlessly.



INTERCUT

EXT. PLANET, The Lake

Backs to the fire, John and Jena sit huddled together on a boulder, a single blanket draped around their hips. Crichton stares vacantly into the darkness, his thoughts elsewhere, he is utterly relaxed and calm.

JENA: I want you to have this.

She removes the necklace from her throat, holding it up, aimed outward. The energy pulse that shoots from the necklace, exploding against the ground, startles him slightly.

JENA: A little stuns, and a lot kills.

She presses the necklace into his hand.

JENA: Tomorrow will be dangerous. Scorpius, Cargn, the Empress' anger... be careful. I might not be able to protect you.

CRICHTON: ( softly ) One step at a time... Jena. One step at a time.

And they kiss. ( Shippers may now open their eyes. :)



INTERCUT

EXT. PLANET

A much smaller campfire illuminating the darkness. Aeryn and Dregon lay flat on the ground on opposing sides of the fire.

DREGON: I'm sorry I brought this on you.

AERYN: Do you always pursue women you don't know?

DREGON: If I'm drawn to them. ... Would you be lying here helpless, giving up, if Crichton were back there waiting for you?

AERYN: You wouldn't understand.

DREGON: Does your leg hurt? It's broken.

AERYN: I'm trained to deal with that.

DREGON: That's the answer. You're not trained to deal with emotions, so you're afraid of them. Emotional pain... you wear like a badge. It means you've been there... and it can't get callused, because each fresh hurt stings like the first.

AERYN: Why would you want that?

DREGON: Because of all the days before it hurts-- the good days-- when you're in love. ... It's too bad you can't get back to at least tell Crichton how you feel.

AERYN: What difference would it make? He's a frelling statue!

DREGON: But he can hear. He can see. He'll know, Aeryn. At least he'll know.



INTERCUT

INT. PALACE

Jena walks down a corridor, she's hailed from behind by a whispered voice. She smiles and stops, not turning.

CRICHTON: You're late.

JENA: I'm moving a little slow.

Crichton steps out from a recessed point in the corridor.

CRICHTON: Are you ready to do this?

JENA: I've grieved with the best of them.

CRICHTON: All right. Show time.

JENA: I hope it all works out.

CRICHTON: One way or the other.

Lifting her hand, Jena offers Crichton a compatability vial. He eyes it sourly.

CRICHTON: We're not compatable.

Jena flings the small vial over her shoulder and smiles as it shatters behind her.

JENA: You always know... just what to say.

CRICHTON: Not always. ... Just sometimes I know... who to say it to.

JENA: Give me some time before you enter.



INTERCUT

EXT. PLANET

Aeryn hauls Dregon across the planet, quivering and gasping with every painful step.
DREGON: Aeryn...

AERYN: What?

DREGON: Look!

Aeryn glances back to Dregon, then in the direction he indicates. On the crest of a near hill, a young man stands, his white garb flapping in the wind. ( And o-my-gawd, I get a total 'Luke Skywalker' vibe during this scene! hehe )

MAN: ( shouting ) Hello! Hello! Do you need help?! Stay there... I'll come and get you!

AERYN: Yotz!

Aeryn slumps to the ground, sitting gingerly beside Dregon's head.

DREGON: Aeryn... listen... I know this didn't turn out like we wanted. I know I was a hindrance... but, I was hoping... we could go out again?



INTERCUT

INT. PALACE

Tyno, Rygel and a few guards watch as Jena weeps over the corpse of her fiance.

JENA: No! No! This can't be!

TYNO: I'm sorry, Jenavian. There was nothing we could do.

RYGEL: Surely the Empress knows that this is the Scarran's work! How could she not?!

TYNO: Of course she knows, and he will be the first one put to death.

RYGEL: But why the rest of us?

TYNO: Because... fool that he was-- no offense-- Prince Clavor was her son. You will all be arrested and executed.

CRICHTON: I feel compelled to disagree with the Empress on that decision.

Crichton strides casually into the room from the ill lit corridor, standing across the table from the other three. He's back in his PK garb.

RYGEL: Crichton!... Crichton!

CRICHTON: Hey, Sparky.

TYNO: Oh, thank the spirits.

CRICHTON: Jena... sorry about your prince... but I hear he deserved it.

Jena looks up from her 'mourning', rage twisting her lovely features. She hauls back and slaps Crichton across the face, then runs tearfully from the room.

( And YES that is five really good slaps on the 'ol kisser for our favorite astronaut. That plus the whole freezo thing, the walk in space thing, the disintegrator gun thing, and the almost asphyixiated thing.... doesn't that all make up for a few non-Aeryn kisses and the one teensy little meaningless non-Aeryn sex thing? Come on! hehe ;)

TYNO: Your Excellency! Who defiled your position? Who rescued you?

CRICHTON: Later-- Rygel, what about the others?

RYGEL: Nothing on Aeryn, I'm sorry. D'Argo's with Scorpius, they think the Scarran has Chiana, so they're going to kill him.

Crichton turns on his heel and strides purposefully out of the room.

TYNO: Crichton! Where are you going?!

CRICHTON: I don't know. ... I'll let you know when I get there.

RYGEL: I'm assuming my execution is off.



END ACT III










ACT IV





ROYAL PLANET, The Foundry

D'Argo and Scorpius enter the abandoned foundry. Stifled whimpering directs D'Argo's attention upward where he spies Chiana, bound by the wrists to a length of chain. She is gagged and suspended above the large cistern of acid.

D'ARGO: Chiana!

CARGN: Stay back!

SCORPIUS: He cannot damage your brain from this distance... but any closer.

D'ARGO: There are two of us, and only one of him. How badly do you want him dead?

CARGN: Come no closer, or the girl dies...

D'ARGO: That will not help Prince Clavor become king.

CARGN: Agreed... this is about killing you.

SCORPIUS: The girl... has she told you where Crichton is?

CARGN: Of course not. She doesn't know... but she did say that you aren't allies and that, in all probability, you did not come here to impede my plan!

SCORPIUS: It must be painful to realize that you are defeated... yes! Defeated! ... By nothing more than your own suspicions!

Scorpius looks a bit uncomfortable in the heat of the foundry.

CARGN: Too hot in here Scorpius?

D'ARGO: What's the matter?

CARGN: When he becomes incapacitated, I shall turn my full attention on you.

SCORPIUS: ( growling ) Nothing-- it's nothing. Don't listen to him!

CARGN: Because, if you do, you'd know this mutant's weakness... that his Scarran half loves the heat... thrives in heat... craves heat.... But, his Peacekeeper half is destroyed by that same warmth.

D'ARGO: Is this true?!

Well it must be, as Scorpius is virtually staggering now, using the dangling chains to remain upright.

CARGN: Thermal regulator suit... cooling rods inserted directly into your brain... tell me the rumors are true. Please tell me your search for thermic constancy is tormentful.

Enraged, Scorpius hurls himself against the Scarran, they snarl as the grapple with each other. The Scarran has the advantage however, and slams Scorpius up against the wall, then hurls him to the floor.

D'ARGO: No!

D'Argo charges the Scarran before he can finish Scorpius. Cargn turns, activating his laser blade, but D'Argo deflects it easily. Unfortunately the blade, in being pushed upward, slashes through and severs one of the chains holding Chiana suspended above the acid. She screams as one arm flails in the air, holding on momentarily with only one hand before securing a grip with the other.

D'Argo continues to pound on Cargn, the blade deactivated. Without weapons they are both reduced to tearing at each other by main strength... again the Scarran gains the upper hand, slamming D'Argo to the ground where he lies, stunned.
CARGN: Luxan coward... now you will die!

The Scarran lifts D'Argo up, raising him above his head, ready to dash him to the floor again, or perhaps into the pool of acid, when Crichton arrives, running through the dangling chains, pushing them aside with one hand, holding Jena's necklace out in the other.

Crichton leaps down the steps into the foundry room, firing two shots into Cargn's back. The Scarran howls and drops D'Argo, spinning about to face this new enemy.
CRICHTON: Hey!

CARGN: Crichton!

Crichton spares a glance upward to see Chiana screaming as she tries to cling to her precarious grip on the chains. He glances back down quickly and fires several more shots into the Scarran's chest. Cargn staggers backward before advancing on Crichton.

Crichton backs up the steps holding onto the dangling chains as the Scarran advances slowly. He fires the pulse weapon several more times, the Scarran staggers and howls but keeps advancing, circling the cistern of acid until he stands just below the the steps, preparing the tear Crichton into little bits. Crichton fires again, but the Scarran refuses to go down!


CARGN: You... haven't.... defeated.... me!!!

CRICHTON: Obviously not! But you dumped me in the acid... so let's see how you like it.

Crichton drops the necklace on the floor, grabs a handful of chain length above his head, and swinging on the chain, hurls his entire weight foward, his feet slamming into the Scarran's chest. Overbalanced the Scarran staggers backward, the back of his knees striking the edge of the pool of acid and falls backward with a splash.

The Scarran roars as it flails about in the acid, finally gurgling and disappearing below the surface. Crichton drops to the floor, watching in horrified amazement. As Cargn gurgles his last gasp, he's finally distracted by another muffled scream from Chiana, her grip on the chain seems to be failing.


CRICHTON: Chiana!!

Chiana's grip does not fail, but the chain finally comes loose, and she drops toward the pool of acid.

D'ARGO: No!

D'Argo dives out over the pool, his shoulder colliding with Chiana's body as she falls, his strength and the power of his leap driving them both to the other side. D'Argo lands, crouched on his feet, Chiana draped over his shoulder. He gathers her into his arms, stroking her face, pulling the gag out. She loops her bound hands over his shoulders hugging and kissing him emphatically.

CHIANA: ( whispering ) You're the best!

CRICHTON: ( amazed ) How Batman was that?! ... You guys okay?!

D'ARGO: We're fine, John. It's good to see you.

CRICHTON: You too. What about Scorpius, is he dead?

D'ARGO: If he isn't, he should be by the time you come out.

D'Argo stands, Chiana still huddled in his arms, her legs wrapped around his waist, and he walks out, taking with him what he came for.

Crichton walks around the cistern, pulls Scorpius off the floor and slams him chest down, on the edge of the pool of acid, pressing his face toward the bubbling surface. Abruptly, Crichton's face twists in pain, and his head begins to drop to one side as if he might be losing conciousness... obliterated by a flash of brilliant light.


**He's back in the Aurora Chair, Scorpius leering over his shoulder bringing a long pointed device to bear against the back of his neck. Crichton screams in agony.**


Another flash of brilliant light and Crichton jerks his head back up, as one half asleep may do when waking abruptly, his eyes open and blank features again assume a look of fierceness. He leans down close to Scorpius' ear, whispering a dangerous message.


CRICHTON: I'm not your enemy... I'm not your friend... you leave me the hell alone... or the next time we part... one of us will be dead.

Crichton releases Scorpius and backs slowly away, finally turning he makes his way toward the exit, looking back twice before disappearing around the corner, his expression a mixture of dread and confusion.

Scorpius stands quickly. Once more erect and poised. He trails gloved fingers through the pool of acid, flicking the moisture off before exiting the foundry.




INTERCUT

INT. PALACE

Crichton and the Empress pace back and forth on opposite sides of the statue of Katralla, Tyno watches in the background. Crichton in his full PK garb, long coat flapping as he paces, is ready to depart the zoo.

CRICHTON: I am sorry if it upsets your line of succession, but I am not going to be a statue again.

NOVIA: I understand your concerns, as I'm sure you understand ours. However, if you're the kind of man who would walk away from his own child. We would not want you to rule.

CRICHTON: Child? What the hell are you talking about?

NOVIA: My daughter is pregnant with your seed.

CRICHTON: How? Whoa! How? No, no... we never--

NOVIA: Samples from the DNA comparison. Did you really think a system this stable would leave so important a detail to chance?

Crichton freezes, his face a mask of steel determination...

CRICHTON: Make me a statue.

NOVIA: You change your mind so quickly.

CRICHTON: A child deserves two parents. My child deserves a father. Make me a statue.

NOVIA: Counselor Tyno. Arrange for this... honorable man, to re-undergo the transmutation process.

TYNO: I'm afraid that's impossible, Empress.

Both Crichton and the Empress turn on Tyno, respective glares pierce the poor soul.

TYNO: Recall that Crichton is not Sebacean. Based on our findings, human physiology would not tolerate the process a second time.

CRICHTON: What the hell are you talking about?

TYNO: If you stood beneath that machine again you would die.

CRICHTON: She won't be defrosted for another 80 cycles. I'm not gonna live that long-- I won't be there for them!

TYNO: I know... I'm sorry.

Crichton looks at Katralla with awful sadness.

CRICHTON: ( softly ) You take my place.

TYNO: I can't.

CRICHTON: Nobody knows me right? The public-- they don't know who I am.

TYNO: Your unveiling was to be your introduction.

CRICHTON: Right.

Crichton takes the transmitter from Tyno and crosses the room to the Empress.

CRICHTON: Counselor Tyno can be your new king.

NOVIA: Their chromosomes are not compatable--

CRICHTON: It doesn't-- matter. She's already pregnant, and it satisfies everything that you need... and it gives my child a good father.
Crichton stands before Katralla again.

CRICHTON: ( softly ) And they love each other.

Crichton brings the transmitter to his ear.

CRICHTON: What do you say? Does this work for you?

KATRALLA: Yes... thank you.

CRICHTON: I'm sorry... that I won't be around.

KATRALLA: I'll... never forget.

Crichton lowers the transmitter and looks toward Novia.

CRICHTON: It's your call.

NOVIA: ( reluctantly ) As long as the secrets we forge in this room do not escape... It can be done.

CRICHTON: Well... there you go. Good guys win for once. ... And I have a child that I'll never know.

Crichton turns to leave, walking away quickly, pressing the transmitter into Tyno's hand as he passes. Tyno brings the transmitter to his ear, and turns to look toward Crichton's retreating back.

TYNO: Princess Katralla wants to know if you'd like to see your offspring.

Crichton freezes, and turns back.

CRICHTON: Yes.

Crichton walks slowly toward the projector. Stepping onto the platform, he lowers himself to one knee in front of a slight auburn haired girl of about 4 years of age.

CRICHTON: Hi there.

GIRL: Hi. ... Are you my dad?

CRICHTON: Yeah, that's right.

GIRL: I love you, Daddy.

Crichton gathers the girl gently into his arms, pressing his face into her sweet hair, holding her for a moment before releasing her. Too quickly gone, the projection ends leaving him kneeling alone on the platform. He rises slowly, a tear falling to the floor.

Stepping wearily down from the platform he walks slowly to Katralla, gently stroking her shoulder with his fingertips. He lowers his hand walks away with finality. Passing by Tyno he gives one last message before leaving.


CRICHTON: You take care of my little girl.



END ACT IV








EPILOGUE



INT. MOYA, D'Argo's Quarters

Chiana stands behind the privacy screen, arms draped across the top, her chin resting on her arms.

CHIANA: So, how come Crichton didn't kill Scorpius?

D'ARGO: It was a mistake. One that I fear will come back to haunt us.

CHIANA: Yeah, but he can't follow us... right?

D'ARGO: Well, Pilot says that we're safe for now.

CHIANA: Did he tell you what happened to Moya?

D'ARGO: ( shakes his head ) Zhaan either. Rygel thinks they were scared. I just think they were lost. Either way, they're keeping it to themselves.

CHIANA: Hey.

Chiana, wrapped in a golden blanket, kneels behind D'Argo on the bed, gently kissing, and rearranging one of his tankas.

CHIANA: I'm very proud of you.

D'ARGO: I'm proud of you. You handled yourself well.

CHIANA: ( grinning ) Well, you handled meself well too. ... What's the matter?

D'ARGO: Ah, I just can't stop thinking about how Crichton will never see his daughter again.

CHIANA: Hits pretty close to home, huh?

D'ARGO: The fact that I may never see my son again is a grief I would wish upon no one. It pains me to think of what he's going through right now.

CHIANA: It pains me too... and you thought we weren't compatable.



INTERCUT

Aeryn's chosen the maintenance bay to work out in... hmm. She's doing some vigorous press ups when Crichton enters with a part for the module. She notes his entrance, and his stream of conciousness dialogue as he moves across the bay, and climbs into the shuttle to perform some maintenance.

CRICHTON: Zhaan said the surgical reconstructors did an excellent job on your leg. There's no sign that it was ever broken. ... Yeah, I was, uh... worried about you when you didn't show up for the wedding...

Crichton glances over toward Aeryn, but she doesn't respond, just continues with the pressups.

CRICHTON: Anyway, I'm, ah... I'm just glad you're okay. ... And I have noticed your not talking to me.

Aeryn abandons her work out. She stands and retrieves a small vial from the crate in front of her. She turns toward Crichton, one hand on hip, the other holding up the vial, but makes no other move.

Crichton glances toward her again, and sits frozen, not moving or speaking. Watching her walk toward him, limping slightly, still holding the vial in plain view.

Reaching the side of the module, she holds the vial up within his easy reach. He looks at the vial, then looks at her. They both look vaguely frightened, or sad or both. Finally taking the vial from her he places a small drop of the fluid on his tongue, glancing at her again, now both seem slightly anxious. Dipping the cap into the vial, he offers it to Aeryn... waiting, his hand steady. Another glance into his eyes and she opens her mouth slightly, he places the drop on her tongue and reseals the vial. They look at each other again, she very fearful, he very determined.

From his place kneeling inside the module he leans forward and down, and she lifts her chin slightly. Their tongues touch.

They look at each other silently for a heartbeat.

And then they kiss.

Pulling away from the kiss, Aeryn lifts her eyes to his, her expression no longer fearful, but quite blank otherwise. John remains quiet, crossing his arms on the edge of the module, his expression revealing nothing. Slowly she turns her back to him, her blank expression slowly converting to a relaxed smile that lights her eyes. She limps quietly away.

Watching her go, Crichton smiles as tears begin to glisten in his eyes, he strokes his lips thoughtfully with his thumb.






ROLL ENDING CREDITS








| Return to Transcripts Index | Return to FARSCAPE ALLY! | Return to ALLY'S PLACE | Back to CHAINMALE TRIVIA Main | | Back to CMT GAME INDEX |